More and more often I have direct requests from my clients related to the Underestimation syndrome, or the so called "Impostor Syndrome".
Each of them describes their condition in a different way but I can outline the following symptoms of this syndrome:
- Denial of one's own achievements
- Anxiety
- Perfectionism
- Self-doubts
- Fear of failure
This is like having a bad friend who constantly points out negative things about you.
- - „You don't deserve it! Look, these people are really smart, you aren't”
- - „You succeeded this time but will you next time?”
- - „Didn't you see how this colleague performed at the meeting? Your place is not here!”
Does it sound familiar?
The client truly believes that whatever achievement they haveit is a resultof pure luck. They are afraid that someone will find that theyare not suitable for their position and that they have behaved as "crooks" who imposed themselves there. The praises or positive feedback which they receive do not reinforce their belief in their own strengths, talents or results. Such a person often chooses a job or work environment that is highly stressful. These people are attracted like butterflies to strong flame. They need this tension and suffering, they need to prove themselves, to give themselves away to the maximum.
All of us regularly experience this syndrome when we are in an unfamiliar situation, environment, new position, or when we are simply tired. It is a fact that Impostor Syndrome can remain for life but there are a few things that can still be done to get it under control.
I can give these few:
- Live, fall, stand up and get help when you need it.
- Allow yourself to be vulnerable. No one is perfect.
- If you once again find yourself comparing to someone else, stop for a moment and compare with the person you were yesterday or one year ago.
- Create a "different character" in your head that does not give in to the voice of self-criticism and even manages to joke about the situation. Laughing at yourself can be winning strategy. We are all imposters from time to time, aren't we?